036: 2022 Formula 1 Australian Grand Prix [Pt. 4 of 4]

Day 04 Sunday – Race Day Rigmarole

I was sure to come earlier than usual but even then, I was stuck behind a large crowd. Annoyingly, the gates were only going to open at the exact scheduled time of 09:00 and not a minute earlier. It's now 09:00 and the gates have opened and I’m slowly trundling towards the security check. Over the course of this weekend, the security checks have been a mixture of thorough and lax; today, I got the short end of the stick. They were more scrutinising (but not really, because they missed a whole compartment of my backpack) and asked questions, which was a first.

Bag zipped up, I am hurried over to yesterday’s spot. The whole front line was already occupied.. damn. I slipped myself behind the only section without the folding camp chairs. I thought to myself that it was still okay; I’m still close to the front and I had a long enough lens to get some snaps. As soon as I stood in place, a guy in front, to my left, told me to not come any closer since he was saving the space for more of his group. Sure, it wasn’t that big a deal, until I witnessed a slight kerfuffle… Moments later, another random guy comes and tries to slot himself between the two groups ahead of myself. These guys were having none of it; Mr. “tough” guy on the left was just shoving him out and the folks on the right just went along with it.

Yikes.

Now I was here by myself at the time and my friends were going to join me at a later stage. After what I just saw, I didn’t know what more to expect.

As the starting acts came and went, so did the people — not that there were many to begin with. Come lunch time, people poured in by the many and my bladder was busting bit by bit. Luckily, a few mates came to my rescue to hold the meagre fort. Of course, Mr. “tough” guy glanced at the few extras and tried to assert his presence. It was just constant grief with this guy – always trying to nudge back, playing footsie or lash out as if he was in the right. Even his kids could see that this guy was being a prick and would try to get him to keep to himself as we were. Adding to this cruel concoction, a soured cherry on top — another person tacking themselves onto the “tough” guy’s entourage. This lady looked like she had been on fifty different drugs at once, with zombie-like sunken eyes and cheeks and teeth more rotted than one too. Much like our macho man, she moved around a lot too, not in any that would step on our toes, but just annoyingly sway from side to side, whipping that hair back and forth, obscuring our viewing. As much as these guys annoyed the living daylights out of me, what I found more annoying was the amount of people who did not utilise their spot at the front row. The amount of times where people were sitting down, facing away from the action and not even paying attention was ridiculous! WHY?! Why did you even come? Why were you still staying in that spot if you weren’t going to actually use it to its full potential?? Absolutely infuriating.

wash it porsche GT3
two porsches bump into each other
three car Porsche sandwich
a spun out printech porsche
dayco porsche.
porsche passing spun out porsche
printech porsche
force accessories porsche
damaged front bumper race porsche
monster wheels bob jane tmarts porsche
timken porsche
spun out porsche GT3
spun out porsche GT3
monster wheels bob jane tmarts porsche
pro am driver porsche parked in service lane
red and white livery porsche
red and white livery porsche
ampol red bull supercar
aston martin vantage safety car

Racing intermission with the driver’s parade. Not many of them looked at our side. We’re too plebian for them?

f1 driver parade Oscar Piastri
f1 driver parade Daniel Ricciardo
f1 driver parade Lando Norris
F1 driver parade Fernando Alonso
f1 driver parade Esteban Ocon
f1 driver parade Mick Schumacher sitting
f1 driver parade Mick Schumacher waving
f1 driver parade Kevin Magnussen waving
f1 driver parade Max Verstappen
f1 driver parade Sergio Perez
f1 driver parade Valtteri Bottas
f1 driver parade Zhou Guanyu
f1 driver parade Yuki Tsunoda
f1 driver parade Pierre Gasly
f1 driver parade Lewis Hamilton
f1 driver parade George Russell
f1 driver parade Alex Albon
f1 driver parade Sebastian Vettel
f1 driver parade Sebastian Vettel
five RAF planes
raf aerial show
raf aerial show

Unfortunate misgivings aside, turns three and four still proved to be a great spot, as most of the action ended up happening here (overtakes and the odd run off).

F1 Haas Mick Schumacher
F1 Alpha Tauri Yuki Tsunoda
F1 Aston Martin Sebastian Vettel
F1 Alpha Tauri Yuki Tsunoda
F1 Alpine Fernando Alonso
F1 both Mclarens racing each other
F1 Haas Aston Martin racing
F1 Mclaren Lando Norris
F1 Mercedes AMG George Russell
F1 Apine Esteban Ocon chasing
F1 Aston Martin Vettel
F1 Alpine Fernando Alonso
F1 Williams Alex Albon
F1 Red Bull racing Sergio Perez
F1 Alpha Tauri Pierre Gasly
Lewis Hamilton F1 Mercedes AMG
Williams Alex Albon F1
F1 Mercedes AMG George Russell
F1 Alpha Tauri Yuki Tsunoda
Goatifi F1 WIlliams
F1 Mclaren Daniel Ricciardo
F1 Alpine Esteban Ocon
F1 Red Bull Max Verstappen
F1 Aston Martin Sebastian Vettel
F1 Alpha Tauri Pierre Gasly
F1 Apha Tauri Yuki Tsunoda
F1 alfa romeo Valtteri Bottas
F1 Alpine Fernando Alonso
F1 Alpine Esteban Ocon
F1 Red Bull Sergio Perez
F1 Red Bull Verstappen leading pack
F1 Alpine Esteban Ocon racing
F1 Alpha Tauri Gasly in front of other Alpha Tauri
F1 Red Bull Racing Sergio Perez
F1 Mercedes AMG George Russell
F1 Williams Goatifi
F1 Mclaren Lando Norris
F1 Williams Goatifi locks up
Aston Martin Vantage safety car

Once the race was over, people were quick to storm the track. Not the idiots at our section though... it took so long for a semblance of movement. The geniuses were awkwardly trying to hop over the barriers and just made fools of themselves. Thankfully, someone figured out how to open it and we finally made it on track. It was insane how many people were there; not once have I experienced being in such a crowd of people. Quite astonished that I got out of that Covid free.

crowd of people on track Albert Park F1
masked spectator cheering
masked spectator cheering

Cheeecooo~ Cheeeeeeccccoooooo~

number of men on barrier fence
spectator on fence taking photo
group of guys on fence barrier

It was a loooong and slow trek towards the main straight, resulting in a missed chance to see the drivers or any celebrations. I did enjoy seeing the track modifications up close at least.

Once at the main straight, it was a lot of waiting for people to clear out, as I wanted to take a peek at the cars in parc fermé. There were a lot of people hunched at the barriers but I bided my time to admire what was left. Getting (relatively) close to the cars and seeing the incredible engineering and handiwork was just a treat for the eyes. Maaaan, those cars just look so good.

F1 alfa romeo exhaust
F1 Mercedes AMG in parc ferme

Save for that ugly wheel cover .. 🤢

F1 Ferrari T-cam air scoop
F1 Ferrari sidepod intake
F1 Ferrari crew with scrutineer
F1 scrutineer viewing Mercedes AMG car rear wing
Alpha Tauri crewman
Alpha Tauri crewman
F1 Alpine front wing and nose
Alpa Tauri team talking
F1 scrutineer chilling
F1 Haas cockpit
F1 Haas exhaust
F1 Mercedes AMG T-cam airscoop
F1 Alpha Tauri engine cover
F1 Alpha Tauri halo
F1 Alpha Tauri cockpit
F1 Alpha Tauri pushed by crew member
F1 Alpha Tauri crew pushing car
F1 Red Bull T-cam airscoop
F1 Red Bull exhaust
F1 Red Bull rear wing
F1 Red Bull engine cover

All in all, it was an okay event and one that I enjoyed for the most part. I can’t say that I would want to do this Aussie GP again, because it's, frankly, a pretty boring track (just can't beat your dedicated circuits like Spa or Interlagos). Adding to that, I couldn’t follow the race as a whole, despite my presence there in the flesh. In addition to that, having to listen to the Aus commentators was insufferable and nauseating, further decreasing my ability to follow along the race.

Despite my thoughts, I am glad F1 has finally returned to Australia (cos, representtt) — though, it’d be splendid if it returned to Adelaide 😈. Save me some cash money, yo.

This was my first ever in-person Formula 1 grand prix and hopefully not my last. Thank you for reading.